The funny thing about the gay competition is that, because men (especially of the gay variety) are so visually stimulated, the only piece on the chess board that matters is having that traditional lean body. Yes, gay men go to the gym to stay competitive, but since the man-eating marathon doesn't end after marriage, they just keep on competing and competing until death do they part. And you're not going to get any A-list guest stars if you're giving D-list torso with a four-star gut. I'm going to let you in on a little secret: There are countless committed gay couples out there who like to either play on the side or invite guest stars into their beds. No, gay men have to get buff, get married, and stay buff. Gay men, unlike their straight counterparts, don't have the luxury to stay in "fighting shape" just long enough to find a partner before letting their bodies fall to shit afterwords. That is why gay men don't get fat, because if they don't have pecs, guns, and glutes, they're going home alone. If a gay man is not "serving body" while competing to find a trick or boyfriend in one of the more muscle-bound climates of gay culture, he will be sorely shut out. Yes, every gay-at least those of the stereotypical abdominal-obsessed physique that populates Fire Island and Palm Springs-is brought about because gay men are afraid that they will be alone for the rest of their lives. There is only one thing that keeps gay men in shape: fear.
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The book is supposedly, "a stylishly slimming discourse that proves gay men really ARE French women: prone to disdain, favoring cheeky underwear, convinced of their own artistic brilliance, and (of course) calorie-obsessed." Clever, but where does that obsession come from? The advice as to why gay men don't get fat isn't as palatable. French Women Don't Get FatÄoonan's advice will probably be equally cute, fun, and witty.
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The advice from French woman (and millionaire CEO) Mireille Guiliano is cute, fun, and witty. Doonan's book seems to be a take on the best-selling book French Women Don't Get Fat, which makes an argument that if you follow the culturally ingrained diet and lifestyle of a French woman, you too can be skinny, fabulous, and look good in Chanel. I'm a little upset at myself that I didn't think of this idea first. While this is true, the real reason why gay men don't get fat might not be the most marketable message.
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New York gay about town and Barneys creative director Simon Doonan just sold a manuscript for a diet book called Gay Men Don't Get Fat.